Thirty-one.

There is nothing complicated about this.
The list tucked under my pillow.
How I used to enjoy a television show or two,
a favourite restaurant, singing out loud
to a great playlist. And how
I used to be able to remind myself
to partake in such simplicities
as sleeping, or eating breakfast.
I didn't mean to take these things
for granted.

When I say Destruct! it really means
nobody is allowed to touch me.
I understand that it is today,
but how did I get here?

But don't try to tell me
that I don't know love.
I know it well enough to understand
and respect that no human being
has found a way to articulate it.
I know that it comes without conditions
or reigns and that sometimes it means
laughter, or feeling full,
or, calculating the height of a bridge
because you don't want to mess up
anybody's life.

This has nothing to do with romance.
The only thing romantic I can say today is:
At this point in my small existence,
I cannot remember
what anyone else tastes like.

Do I think that I'm an interesting person?
Or even a good person?
No.
But I'm glad you stick around.